Thank God I am feeling better...

Dear Friends,

Thanks for stopping by, and for your prayers and encouragements.

I am thankful for the rest these few days and thank God I am feeling better. I have started taking my anti-depressant, Prozac and I think it is beginning to take effect now.

I have been very exhausted over the last few months but I wasn't feeling down. My moods fluctuated every now and then but it didn't plunge into depression until a few days ago. Now as I look back, I suspect I may have burn-out as I was extremely busy with various commitments.

I found one helpful article on burnout:

Preventing Burnout by HelpGuide.org

Though I tried to slow down over the last few months, I was still very occupied generally and constantly tired. I was too tired to write on this blog or to visit blogs. But you are in my thoughts and prayers. I do missed all of you very much.

Managing this condition is a very great challenge to me. Pacing myself is a constant challenge daily as when I am well I have many projects on my hands and tend to do more and more things. I get carried away :)

Perhaps this is part of the gift of this condition, the creativity and energy to accomplish many things. But the other side of this condition, is that after prolonged busy period, I tend to burn-out and plunge into depression. I am thankful that with medication and other helps, I am feeling better faster and more functional. In the past, it would take about 3 to 6 months before I start feeling better and be functional again.

The feeling of depression is still very distressing nevertheless. Each relapse brings along a fear that I will never get better. But thank God that He does delivers and now with various helps, He delivers me more speedily.

I know I must not over-exert myself yet. I am looking forward to go out tomorrow to visit an elderly lady that is coming to know our Lord Jesus Christ as her Saviour, to read the Bible, sing Psalms and pray with her. I find much joy in giving of myself to help others. It gives me a sense of usefulness despite my condition and brings me great joy.

Thanks again for stopping by. Take care!

Warm regards,
Nancie

Extreme exhaustion and depression

For the last 1 week, I have been experiencing extreme exhaustion. These few days, I am beginning to experience symptoms of depression.

I am finding it hard to wake up in the morning, terribly exhausted, my mind so slowed down that I can't think or feel properly, no energy to do anything, can't enjoy anything I do, my feelings are basically flat, and a terrible sense of uselessness is overwhelming me... but I am praying and resting in God.

I know that God loves me and He is sustaining me through this valley experience. He has a purpose for me to go through this and His grace is sufficient for me, as He promises. He will restore and deliver me in His time.

Meanwhile, I will make use of whatever resources He has given me to get better. I am praying and reading the Bible, and other encouraging books, and looking to God to strengthen my soul spiritually.

I am going to rest as much as I can so that in time to come I will be ready to serve God again. I will endeavour to keep up with my exercise daily to strengthen my body and mind.

I need to fight the negative thoughts that threaten to overwhelm me. It is important for me to remember that these thoughts will go away once I am better. So learning to recognize them and challenge them is important so that they do not pull me down further.

I am thankful to God for all of you, your visits, prayers and encouragements. These are tokens of God's love for me and thank God for everyone of you.

I am resting in the following promises of God, and hope that it encourages you too:

“My grace is sufficient for thee.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

IF none of God’s saints were poor and tried, we should not know half so well the consolations of divine grace.

When we find the wanderer who has not where to lay his head, who yet can say, “Still will I trust in the Lord;” when we see the pauper starving on bread and water, who still glories in Jesus; when we see the bereaved widow overwhelmed in affliction, and yet having faith in Christ, oh, what honor it reflects on the gospel!

God’s grace is illustrated and magnified in the poverty and trials of believers.

Saints bear up under every discouragement, believing that all things work together for their good, and that out of apparent evils a real blessing shall ultimately spring—that their God will either work a deliverance for them speedily, or most assuredly support them in the trouble, as long as He is pleased to keep them in it.

This patience of the saints proves the power of divine grace. There is a lighthouse out at sea: it is a calm night—I cannot tell whether the edifice is firm; the tempest must rage about it, and then I shall know whether it will stand.

So with the Spirit’s work: if it were not on many occasions surrounded with tempestuous waters, we should not know that it was true and strong; if the winds did not blow upon it, we should not know how firm and secure it was.

The master-works of God are those men who stand in the midst of difficulties, stedfast, unmoveable,—

“Calm 'mid the bewildering cry,
Confident of victory.”

He who would glorify his God must set his account upon meeting with many trials. No man can be illustrious before the Lord unless his conflicts be many.

If, then, yours be a much-tried path, rejoice in it, because you will the better show forth the all-sufficient grace of God.

As for His failing you, never dream of it—hate the thought.

The God who has been sufficient until now should be trusted to the end.

Taken from CH Spurgeon's Morning and Evening, 4 March, Morning

"My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. " - what a blessed assurance and comfort! God's grace is sufficient for me. His strength is made perfect in my weaknesses.

Thank you for stopping by!

Thanks for your encouragement. Take care and have a blessed day!

Warm Regards,
Nancie

All things work together for good...

Dear Friends,

Thank God for seeing us through another week. Thank you for stopping by and all your prayers, concerns and encouragements.

Thank God for strengthening me day by day. I have been very busy and tired over the last few months but thankful to be able to live each day for our Lord and serve Him. I am still learning to pace myself and manage my condition. Sometimes my mood swings up and down, but thank God that it is not like the 3 months dipped into severe depression like what I used to experience. So I am learning to live each day for our Lord and am finding much joy in it.

I have been very involved in the ministry of mercy in visiting some sick and elderly. It is a joy and privilege to extend God's love and kindness to His precious ones. Those that are dear to Him, are dear to me. I am greatly encouraged to see the many wonderful ways God are preserving His people, no matter what trials they go through in this world.

Today, I met a friend who told me that with the current worldwide economic crisis and the swine flu, most people she met are very depressing.

I am reminded, that we have a God Who is sovereignly in control of all things, Who loves us with an everlasting love and Who is mercifully working all things for His glory and our good. What a comfort!

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28

To know that nothing hurts the godly, is a matter of comfort, but to be assured that ALL things which fall out shall co-operate for their good, that their crosses shall be turned into blessings, that showers of affliction water the withering root of their grace and make it flourish more, this may fill their hearts with joy till they run over.

"We know." It is not a matter wavering or doubtful. The apostle does not say, We hope, or conjecture, but it is like an article in our creed, WE KNOW that all things work for good.

Hence observe that the truth of the gospel are evident and infallible. A Christian may come not only merely to a vague opinion but to a certainty of what he holds. The Spirit of God imprints heavenly truths upon the heart as with the point of a diamond. We have arrived at a holy confidence.....

The result of this text is this : All the various dealings of God with his children do by a special providence turn to their good.

Taken from Thomas Watson's "All Things For Good".

Thank you for stopping by!

Thanks for your encouragement. Take care and have a blessed day!

Warm Regards,
Nancie

I took this photo at Hort Park, Singapore.

Fear not

Dear Friends,

Thanks for stopping by, and all your prayers and encouragements. Thank God for His goodness and mercies in seeing us through another week.

It has been a very busy and tiring week for me, in much joyful service for our Lord. Thank God for grace and strength daily. I am looking forward to a time of rest and worship this weekend and Lord's day :)

Recently, I read this very comforting portion from CH Spurgeon's Morning and Evening, and reminded afresh that we have a God Who loves us dearly and is in control of all things in our life. So we need not be afraid no matter what befalls us or what we have to go through in this temporal life.

God is continuing to work all things for His glory and our good. He sanctifies us through ever trials and afflictions He allows us to go through. He draws us closer to Himself and enable us to know more and more of His love and sufficiency.

Are you going through a difficult time or fearful time? Fear not, you are of more value than many sparrows. God will take care of you as you cast all your anxieties upon our Lord Jesus Christ. His grace is sufficient for you. He will most assuredly deliver you or continue to support you under the trial so that you may know more and more of His sufficiency and presence with you.

“Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night.”
Psalm 91:5

WHAT is this terror? It may be the cry of fire, or the noise of thieves, or fancied appearances, or the shriek of sudden sickness or death. We live in the world of death and sorrow, we may therefore look for ills as well in the night-watches as beneath the glare of the broiling sun.

Nor should this alarm us, for be the terror what it may, the promise is that the believer shall not be afraid.

Why should he? Let us put it more closely, why should we?

God our Father is here, and will be here all through the lonely hours; He is an almighty Watcher, a sleepless Guardian, a faithful Friend.

Nothing can happen without His direction, for even hell itself is under His control. Darkness is not dark to Him. He has promised to be a wall of fire around His people—and who can break through such a barrier?

Worldlings may well be afraid, for they have an angry God above them, a guilty conscience within them, and a yawning hell beneath them; but we who rest in Jesus are saved from all these through rich mercy.

If we give way to foolish fear, we shall dishonor our profession, and lead others to doubt the reality of godliness.

We ought to be afraid of being afraid, lest we should vex the Holy Spirit by foolish distrust.

Down, then, ye dismal forebodings and groundless apprehensions, God has not forgotten to be gracious, nor shut up His tender mercies; it may be night in the soul, but there need be no terror, for the God of love changes not.

Children of light may walk in darkness, but they are not therefore cast away, nay, they are now enabled to prove their adoption by trusting in their heavenly Father as hypocrites cannot do.

“Though the night be dark and dreary,
Darkness cannot hide from Thee;
Thou art He, who, never weary,
Watchest where Thy people be.”

Taken from CH Spurgeon's Morning & Evening, 22 April, Evening

Thanks again for stopping by. Hope you have a very restful and blessed weekend. Take care.

Warm regards,
Nancie















My friend, CW, took this lovely picture

It is well with my soul : Our eter­nal hope no mat­ter what pain and grief be­fall us on earth

Dear Friends,

Thanks for stopping by.

Today, I was re-reading the following devotional from CH Spurgeon and reminded of how blessed it is to belong to our Lord. God's promise is that IT is well with the righteous always.

♥ I am thankful to God that it is well with us always because we have a God Who loved us and is in control of everything. And God is working all things for His glory and our good (Romans 8:28).

♥ Thank God that I can have this great comfort as I walk with our Lord Jesus Christ daily. In all the ups and downs in life, in sickness and in wellness, in weakness and in strength, it is well with my soul. What a mercy!

♥ I thank God that by His grace, we can live a meaningful and productive life despite whatever trials, afflictions or difficulties we have to go through. For we are more than conquerors through Him Who loved us!

♥ I thank God that He provides people around us who love us and takes care of us. Thanks for each and every one of you for your visits, prayers and encouragements. Your friendship and support means a lot to me. Thank you!

May you too find much encouragement in this precious promises of God.

“Say ye to the righteous, that it shall be well with him.”
Isaiah 3:10

IT is well with the righteous always.

If it had said, “Say ye to the righteous, that it is well with him in his prosperity,” we must have been thankful for so great a boon, for prosperity is an hour of peril, and it is a gift from heaven to be secured from its snares:

or if it had been written, “It is well with him when under persecution,” we must have been thankful for so sustaining an assurance, for persecution is hard to bear;

but when no time is mentioned, all time is included.

God’s “shalls” must be understood always in their largest sense. From the beginning of the year to the end of the year, from the first gathering of evening shadows until the day-star shines, in all conditions, and under all circumstances, it shall be well with the righteous.

It is so well with him that we could not imagine it to be better, for he is well fed, he feeds upon the flesh and blood of Jesus; he is well clothed, he wears the imputed righteousness of Christ; he is well housed, he dwells in God; he is well married, his soul is knit in bonds of marriage union to Christ; he is well provided for, for the Lord is his Shepherd; he is well endowed, for heaven is his inheritance.

It is well with the righteous—well upon divine authority; the mouth of God speaks the comforting assurance.

O beloved, if God declares that all is well, ten thousand devils may declare it to be ill, but we laugh them all to scorn. Blessed be God for a faith which enables us to believe God when the creatures contradict Him.

It is, says the word, at all times well with thee, thou righteous one; then, beloved, if thou canst not see it, let God’s word stand thee in stead of sight; yea, believe it on divine authority more confidently than if thine eyes and thy feelings told it to thee.

Whom God blesses is blest indeed, and what His lip declares is truth most sure and steadfast.

(Taken from CH Spurgeon, Morning & Evening, 14 April, Evening) Go To Morning Reading

I am also reminded of the hymn written by Horation Spafford "It is well with my soul".

This hymn was writ­ten af­ter two ma­jor trau­mas in Spaf­ford’s life. The first was the great Chi­ca­go Fire of Oc­to­ber 1871, which ru­ined him fi­nan­cial­ly (he had been a weal­thy bus­i­ness­man). Short­ly af­ter, while cross­ing the At­lan­tic, all four of Spaf­ford’s daugh­ters died in a col­li­sion with an­o­ther ship. Spaf­ford’s wife Anna sur­vived and sent him the now fa­mous tel­e­gram, “Saved alone.” Sev­er­al weeks lat­er, as Spaf­ford’s own ship passed near the spot where his daugh­ters died, he wrote the words to the hymn "It is Well with My Soul". They speak of the eter­nal hope that all be­liev­ers have, no mat­ter what pain and grief be­fall them on earth.

It is well with my soul

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Refrain

It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

Refrain

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

Refrain

For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:
If Jordan above me shall roll,
No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life
Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.

Refrain

But, Lord, ‘tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait,
The sky, not the grave, is our goal;
Oh trump of the angel! Oh voice of the Lord!
Blessèd hope, blessèd rest of my soul!

Refrain

And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.

Refrain

Hear this moving hymn on Youtube:





Thank you for stopping by!

Thanks for your encouragement. Take care and have a blessed day!

Warm Regards,
Nancie

For more participants of Thankful Thursday, do visit Laurie.

My encounter with Dengue Haemorrhagic Fever about 4 years ago

This morning, I was reminded of how God preserved and restored me when I was down with Dengue Haemorrhagic Fever about 4 years ago.

Dengue fever is a disease caused by the dengue virus which can be transmitted to humans by the bite of an infected mosquito. The incubation period of dengue fever normally ranges from between 3 to 14 days.

Dengue haemorrhagic fever is a more severe form of dengue and can be fatal if unrecognised or not treated.

(For more information about Dengue Fever and Dengue Haemorrhagic Fever, there are is a very useful website that gives some FAQ about Dengue Fever by Ministry of Health in Singapore. World Health Organization also has a useful information on Dengue Fever.)

When I was down with Dengue Haemorrhagic Fever about 4 years ago, it was at a time when Dengue Fever was epidemic in Singapore. It was a time when Dengue Fever was most high since many years, and there were several deaths due to it. Pastor C was just taken home about 1 month ago in that year also due to Dengue Haemorrhagic Fever and a complication of it, Dengue Shock Syndrome.

At that time, I experienced symptoms very similar to flu. I had very high fever, body aches, headaches, joint pains, tiredness and loss of appetite for about 5 days. Taking paracetamol could not bring the fever down. Though I went to the Polyclinic for blood test twice they didn't suspect dengue fever because my platelet count was still within normal range and I didn't have any rashes. It was on the 6th day that I began to develop more severe symptoms like nause, vomitting, abdominal pain and difficulties breathing. My brother immediately took me to the Emergency Unit in the Hospital.

In the Hospital, they did a blood test for me and put me on drip for fluid replacements. After the blood test they told me that they suspect I had Dengue Fever and I needed to be warded. It was in the ward that the Doctor later came and told me that I had the more severe form of Dengue Fever called Dengue Haemorrhagic Fever and my platelet count was only 57 (normal range is 140 to 440). He said that was the second time I had Dengue Fever and that was why it had turned to Dengue Haemorrhagic Fever. They found 2 different Dengue virus in my blood during blood test. But I wasn't even conscious that I ever had Dengue Fever before. I used to get flu very often, and it was possible that I had dengue fever before without knowing it. Usually it is the 2nd time getting Dengue Fever that it becomes fatalistic.

In the Hospital, rashes developed all over my body. The medical people did a blood test for me every day and Doctor ordered me to drink at least 4 liter of water. On my second day of hospitalization my platelet dropped further to 25. The Doctor ordered that I was not allowed to get down from my bed because if I fall I will have internal bleeding and I can die of internal bleeding. Doctor also said that if my platelet continue to drop below 20, then they will put me on blood transfusion. That night, I sms my Pastor and asked him whether he will bury me should the Lord takes me home and he said yes :-) I knew that my condition was critical and the Lord might take me home. Several Dengue Haemorrhagic Fever patients had died due to internal bleeding at that time. So I knew there is a possibility that I might be the next one. But I had complete peace in the Lord and I entrust all things into His Hands.

By God's mercies and sovereignty, He preserved my life. The next day, my platelet count went up to 70 and after that it continued to go up. I was admitted for a total of 6 days. During my period of hospitalization, I saw the goodness and mercies of God upon me. I wasn't as sick as before I was hospitalization. In the Hospital, I was alert and able to sit up and talk to people. Thank God for many friends and brethren in my church who prayed and visited me. I was not very sickly like most Dengue patients were. I was able to read, talk and listen to sermons. Neither did I know how fatal or critical my actual situation was. It was only on the day of discharged, that my Doctor revealed to me how sickly I really was on the day of my admission. According to my Doctor, I was severely dehydrated due to the fever and vomitting, and all my other vital signs were upside down. I was in danger of getting Dengue Shock Syndrome which is fatalistic. Pastor C died of Dengue Shock Syndrome where there is internal bleeding and the body developed shock as a result, and internal organs failed. At the point of discharged, all my vital signs are back to normal and my platelet count also had gone up to 240. The Doctor actually treated me like a case study. Every day he brought a group of Students Doctor to see me and explained things to them. I didn't understand what was going on at first. Only at the point of discharged, that the Doctor told me that my case was very unique and they took me as a study object. They were amazed that I recovered so well when I was clearly very sick. I give thanks and glory to God.

Now as I recounted this incident to you, I am once again in awe at God's power to preserve and protect us from all harm, when we belonged to Him. If He so wills, like in the case of Pastor C, He may take us home through an illness, so that we no longer need to suffer in this world and we can be with Him for all eternity. But if He so desires, He may also demonstrate His power to sustain, protect and restore us, until it is His time to call us home. And meanwhile, may we run the race that is set before us patiently, looking unto Jesus the Author and Finisher of our faith.

Thank God that we can trust in Him no matter what we may have to go through in this life, knowing that He loves us and is working all things for His glory and our good.

Thank you for stopping by. Take care and have a blessed Lord's day!

Whom have I in Heaven but thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee. My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever. Psalm 73:25-26

My friend, Sau, took this picture at Saipan.